When is What You Are and What You’re Doing Enough?
Taking on a Mindfulness approach to life’s needs can be the main source for shifting our paradigms and, ultimately our relationships with ourselves.
Just this morning I found myself seeking to learn something new. This is a pattern I’ve embraced over the past fifteen years. I’ve also noticed that what I select to focus on has to be my choice. Not a suggestion from another unless I’ve allowed them the role of mentor in my life. So, what does this have to do with being enough?
Just in those four sentences I have shared my deepest secrets and faults with you. If you reread them can you intuitively know what I’m about to say?
1. I’m always striving for more.
2. This desire for more came about just as I met my partner. (If you know me you got that.)
3. I struggle with control and being in charge.
4. I’m a tough nut to crack but, if I let you in you are VERY important to me.
5. And last but not least, I’m not good enough JUST the way I am!
Well, up until now this was my pattern and these factors defined me in ways that I wasn’t conscious of.
So, what changed?
Me! Yep, the deepest darkest depths of my mind kept this knowledge from me. Until now.
Now that I’m aware, I can change this pattern and my internal programming to accept this as my truth. You see, change is easy, once you know what you want and the need for change is a necessary prerequisite for growth.
How will I change this (it was just this morning that I had this epiphany)? Well, Since this starts and ends with me… it seems as though I have no choice.
Step one: Today forward, I stop listening to that voice that isn’t speaking through me in love. (You know this voice!) by changing my self-talk I change my perception of myself. Should a negative thought pop into mind, I will simply address it and send it out as quickly as it came in. Sounds easy right? Lol, nope it will indeed be hard. However, the practice of mindful self-talk improves the more we (I) do it.
No punishments or judgments attached to the negative thought(s), that only feeds it. I’ll simply hear it, and let it go, then move forward.
Step two: Embrace the idea that my partner showed me how to love myself. It wasn’t until I met him that I had the motivation to improve who I was. From today forward I now know that the motivation became change. The change was to honor him and myself and our future. This is something that I could have chosen on my own. However, my maturity wasn’t where it needed to be at that time. That’s exactly how it was supposed to be for me. (Perhaps your story has this partner motivation or perhaps it doesn’t, just know your story is yours.) Since that motivation entered my life it was ME who did the work and made the changes. Self-love is a flame waiting inside of you. No matter how that flame is fueled it will ignite. Then it’s yours to tend to, no one else has that privilege.
Step Three: Surrender. I’m in the final phases of truly letting go and allowing life to carry out as intended. This has been an ongoing focus of mine for some time. It is getting easier and I see and feel the benefits. Having faith in those I surround myself with is a HUGE part of surrendering. This doesn’t mean I sit back and do nothing, it simply means that I no longer stress over all the minute details. My mindfulness approach to life’s needs had been the main source of shifting my perspective on control. Knowing that the most important elements to me are; love and connection followed closely by nostalgia, helps me to know what elements in life are worthy of my attention.
So, what’s important to you? You need to know this in order to prioritize.
Step Four: Stop collecting mentors. (Huh?) Well, at what point do I realize that I am the mentor? I’m the one who advises and directs my choices. Asking others what they think and feel is part of the human experience. However, allowing yourself to be led on a consistent basis means your not a leader. I am a leader. I have the same abilities as those who led me, if not more (Well… some of them, lol). Are you a leader? No matter what your answer know this, YOU ARE. If you don’t believe me, answer this, who picked your clothes today? (I really hate to say I told you so…)
Love, share, ask, but make sure you choose the choices that best serve you!
Step Five: As of today my life is full. If I meet someone who fits into my life in some way, I will let them in. I no longer seek to find others to complete me. I’m complete just the way I am. That doesn’t mean that additional laughter and love isn’t welcome. It simply means that I already have that but if the right soul comes along, I’ll laugh with and love them too.
So what does this all have to do with being enough? I guess I’ve realized that I AM MORE THAN ENOUGH. And guess what, SO ARE YOU!
Namaste my friend.
Are you interested in learning more about Mindfulness? Nicole provides Mindfulness Training Classes at The New Hampshire Holistic Health Associates center in Nashua, NH. She also provides one on one Distance Healing courses and Mindfulness Training via Zoom.
Nicole’s Education includes a B.A. in Psychology and a M.Ed., concentration in counseling from Rivier University. She holds an additional post-graduate certificate in Human Resources form SNHU. In addition to her formal education, Nicole is a Certified Clinical Hypnotist and a member of the National Guild of Hypnotists. Nicole has completed certifications in; Neuro Linguistic Programming, Reiki, Qi Gong, Numerology, IET, Chronotherapy, and Aromatherapy.
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